IDONTNO
Whenever I’m on the freeway I notice them. I see them on and around University Avenue, especially near the restaurants. Many of my friends have them. Mine is just government issue, dull, boring, and not expressive of me or my beliefs (sigh).
I guess you figured out I’m talking about license plates (number plates for my non-US readers). Stan Dale’s was SEX IS OK. Janet’s used to be PURELOV. Helen’s was QT PI. Others I see around include: LOV IS IT, LOV IS ALL, and SNUGLEE. One Jewish friend had SHAFFAH (Hebrew for bunny) on her VW Rabbit. Mine is 5SHE372. Don’t try to figure it out, its just the plate after 5SHE371 and before 5SHE373.
I had a “vanity plate” for awhile - WEDSRV(Heart). I meant it to say “We Deserve Love” but people mostly thought it was something about Wedding Services (which I do, in fact, perform). So I let it go.
Lately I’ve been experiencing symptoms of male “menoporsche” -a sudden lack of energy, crankiness and the overpowering urge to buy a Porsche. So I’ve been thinking about getting a special plate. A Friend suggested IDONTNO and I’m liking it a lot.
“IDONTNO” I don’t no. Oh sure, I think negative thoughts all the time, just like you. It’s my life’s work to learn to not give those thoughts power over me. My life used to be filled with “no.” I couldn’t…I shouldn’t…I’m not the kind of person who… I’d never…”No” was a regular refrain in my conversations, beliefs and thoughts. Not surprisingly, I was unhappy.
One day, I discovered the power of “yes.” Through hypnosis, I quit my several-pack-a-day cigarette habit, by affirming my YES to life. I became a hynotherapist and personal growth coach, and am constantly discovering a whole world of YES. From where I stand, it often seems like a life well-lived is predicated on ones ability to say YES and see the YES all around.
“IDONTNO” I don’t know. Another source of my unhappiness has something to do with using “knowing” to hide from feeling. My unhappiness has, at times, feels like a hole I try to fill with knowing. I read. I study. I memorize and learn dates, quotes, facts, information, theories. I’ve learned how to seem knowledgeable even when I’m totally lost, baffled, confused. I behave as if “knowing” is the key to happiness, which, of course, is not true. Werner Erhard (creator of est - a 70’s era workshop) once said “Understanding is the booby prize” - the prize they give to the losers. As Erhard’s trainers liked to say, the only thing you really need to know is “What is, is, and what ain’t, ain’t.”
Now my life’s work is about being with people, present to their feelings and mine, my heart and mind open. I don’t know. I don’t need to know. I don’t no. I don’t want to no.
