So here I am in Vegas at the New Media Expo — learning all about the wacky and wild world of blogging and podcasting.

So here I am with the publisher of of my podcast, The Fearless Lover, Susan and Tim Bratton of Personal Life Media, sitting in the hallway, talking to my beloved about my 17 year old and breaking trust and gaining trust and guiding him into the manhood as a man of integrity.

Integrity. Unlike television, with its shameful “news” divisions, false dramas and lost little white girls, and unlike television with its bloviating gasbags like Rush and Hannity — the new world of social media demands integrity. You will be outed if you are a liar. Character counts. Its a virtual community, yes, but the people are REAL.

And no matter what you’re posting or twittering or digging, it goes back to the oft-ignored slogan of the Las Vegas Hard Rock Hotel out my window here — “Love All. Serve All.”

And I am on the phone in a cavernous hall in Vegas - of all places - talking integrity.

What happens when my son promises no drinking at the house or on the property up in lovely Topanga while I’m away — and it happens? Even though just a little.

I publish The Fearless Lover to explore the spiritual roots of enduring love. I am about to heave all my dating advice books and audio series — The Right Man Online, Erotic Mastery, Tantric 101, The Complete Attractor, etc — over to a new heading: The Fearless Dater.

What is a Fearless Dater? It means bringing your whole self forward fearlessly and openly so that you can encounter another person as a whole and open being (I tell women, either convey that you are a whole woman, or guys’ll just treat you like a woman with a hole.)

And yet here I am, sitting on the carpet, cycling through a thousand thoughts on how to be the best parent I can be at the moment. How much discipline? How much consequence?

What my son will get is real consequences — loss of a trip he wants very much. But he will also get a vision of himself as a man of integrity — what I know, as his father,  — is his greatness, his offering, his gift to the world. It may take a few years…

But I want him to grow into a Fearless Lover. Not only of an intimate partner, but of truth, service, depth.

Discipline with one hand. Love and Vision with the other.

Any thoughts from you on that, oh parents or children of parents out there?

Fearful lovers lie.  Fearful lovers cling.  Fearful lovers may or may not see the truth.

If they do, the are afraid of how the truth will lacerate their safety.  They choose to swaddle their familiar life, or their hoped-for life, in lies.

And by doing so, suffocate exactly those things that are familiar, exactly those things that they hope for.

In other words, they not only kill what comforts them in the moment…

They snuff the breath of out of love…

This week I am thinking about TRUTH and fearless loving.

When do you see it?  When you do feel it?  When do you tell it?  When do you live it.

And, oh, yeah, by the way — what happens when your truths collide?  When does the truth of your ego self conflict with the truth of your highest “selfless”-self?

Ah!  you thought this was gonna be easy.

I’ll be posting on this in a few days.

Meanwhile — what you do honestly feel is the role of truth in fearless loving?

When is it self serving?  And when does it actually serve the ones you love, or love itself?

Love on…

Adam

Quick question –

What do your mom, Joel Osteen, Eckhardt Tolle and Conde Nast’s Portfolio magazine have in common?

Answer: They know something about the power of love.

In this week’s episode, we take an idea expressed by the toothsome evangelist, Joel Osteen, he of the ubiquitous airport bookrack about his work — and make it our own, about our life.

As you’ll hear, in an article in Portfololio, Mr. Osteen comments on the passion everyone in his company — his church — exhibits in their “product.”

They are charged up because they passionately believe in the message Mr. Osteen’s brand of spirituality offers.

In crass mercantile terms, they believe in their product.

What is your life product?

Consider this: it is the love you create.

In this episode, I explore how you can constantly and FEARLESSLY improve your product — and thereby create the full life of love you most desire.

It ain’t always easy. There are design flaws. Setbacks. Employees (like, um, your will, your discipline, your lovers) may quit midstream. Read the rest of this entry »